Monday, April 20, 2009


You know, I just don't get some people.

Without going into too many details, I will explain something that has been part of my life for the last five years and will continue to be part of my life, so long as I am married to my husband.

From the outside, there is an obvious physical difference between me and my husband. That alone makes people draw their own conclusions about us, mostly negative. From one of us there is an ex who is hell-bent on telling ghastly lies and spreading any kind of rumor they can conjure up to try to make us look bad to our kids' friend's parents. In this, they have succeeded. Nevermind that this ex chronically gets fired from jobs for screaming at co-workers and patients (a "nurse"), loses significant others to infidelity and rage, gets evicted from homes due to unacceptable disturbances, alienates friends for being undependable, and of course, has done one hell of a job of making their kids hate them. Now. We, on the other hand, have literally and truly never had one of these things happen to us, in all our lives - both together and before, and yet we are the ones who are looked at and treated like freaks. It is really, really frustrating.

Now that our kids are getting older and are starting to see this for themselves, they are getting upset because they are seeing that friends are not allowed to come over, etc. All because of lies. We have lived in the same home for over 5 years, have had the same jobs for that amount of time, are happily married and you won't believe this but have never ONCE even yelled at each other, and yet we are somehow the bad guys. I am just appalled at the foolishness and immaturity of these people, who don't even take the time to get to know us for who we are. It literally is just that bad. We go to all the school functions, volunteer in both kid's classes, go to all the sporting and musical events, host sleepovers and playdates (with true friends), and have a normal, kid-centered life.

I can't begin to express how this really gets my hackles up. Of course, we have good and true friends who see us for who we are and know the truth. And for them we are so glad. And really, obviously these other people aren't worth the time in the first place. But it is really frustrating to have people thinking and saying untrue things about us when we're the ones doing all the right stuff.

I can really understand and empathize with all people who have been discriminated against for various things, whether it was/is for interracial marriage, disabilities, economic status or social class. It all hurts. I guess some people never got the memo about thinking for themselves and drawing conclusions based on real life experience. So long, suckers!

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